"ideal spouse"

I don't really have a model for my ideal spouse.  The thing is, I'm not sure what I want yet, and I might not even ever know what I want (besides, of course, a male).

But really, I think every guy is kind and loving (even if he may not look it), so I don't need to write about that.  Every one is understanding in a sense, some just need a little warming up to crack open their shells, and nobody thinks of themselves as not understanding.  Every one thinks of themselves as smart, and every one really is smart, just smart with different things.  You could go to Harvard and yet be the most socially inept person in the world, that's just a way God is fair.

I don't want the guy I end up with to fit the mold of "ideal".  I want him to surprise me, initially and throughout the rest of my relationship; I guess Mr. Lee would call this kind of person a "round character", filled with tragic flaws and pet peeves.  If my spouse was perfect, I'd end up getting frustrated with myself a lot.  We'd need to be an equal amount of imperfect, I think.  

Now I know I said I wasn't sure about what I wanted in the perfect guy, but I know exactly what I want him to look like on the outside.  I definitely love dark shaggy hair and big, tired eyes.  Scruff is definitely welcomed.  Definitely tall, I love tall guys.  And lean - not skinnier than me, but with a little muscle going on.  Also, men wearing jeans are definitely hotter than men not wearing jeans (especially men who wear khaki shorts).

To be honest, I wouldn't mind being with the man I'm with now for a while.  He definitely makes everyday interesting and spontaneous, and for whatever reason, he always has some way of making me smile or making me feel at ease.  He makes me feel peaceful and happy and content and loved, and makes me come out of my shell, holed up in my house.  He's even taller than me!  But if we're meant to be, it's going to take a lot of pushing by the Fates; I'm moving overseas to the States and he's still going to be stuck on the rock for another year.  We both feel as though a long distance relationship would be impossible and frustrating, so we're avoiding it.  I'm going to miss our lazy Saturday afternoons together and the way is hugs are somehow so inviting.  It's definitely going to be hell going to a restaurant and looking at San Pellegrino on the menu.